Oh hey, I didn’t see you there – was just polishing my belt. I was asked if I would be continuing this column this year and, being the showman that I am, I said no knowing damn well that that was a lie.

 

Last year I finished as the champ and 47-46 on my predictions for the year. It was a strong performance, I’m not gonna sugarcoat it. Can I do it again? Well, I crunched the numbers and I have a 19% chance of winning the league and a 100% chance of a positive pick record.

 

Matchup of The Week: “What Dakschund?” vs The Tom Hillier Experience (C)
Brad L vs Tom

The only teams projected to score in the 90s square off in the first Matchup of the Week. A huge point of emphasis will be the Falcons running backs, Brad has Freeman and I have Coleman. I concede that Freeman will likely be higher scoring but I am hopeful that Big Ben vs Browns, Baldwin vs GB, David Johnson vs anyone and healthy Gronk will bring me to glory. I pick me, but I do fear the Bills defense vs the Jets and a fresh DeMarco Murray.

Chips n’ Gronk vs Charles Schwab Series 8
Xavi vs Tyler L

Both teams are rolling out shoe-in Hall of Famers at the QB position but neither has a juicy matchup. Tyler, however, has 2 dreamy RB matchups with McCoy vs Jets and CMC vs SF. He may or may not have one Zeke Elliot at his disposal as well. The problem with Tyler’s team is his receiving corps to include his TE Austin Hooper. I like Hooper, he was my plum pick on the RUTS Tight End episode but we will see how quickly he comes to fruition if at all. Regardless, Xavi has some tough matchups all the way through so I will be going with the Flyin’ Buffalonian. Shaka Brah.

Hopeless ROMOntic 2 vs So LA
Weston vs Tyler

Weston is trying to relive his championship year by donning his old moniker, but we will see if that works or if he will be swallowed by the cumpetition. As a competitor, you’ve gotta hope Tyler can pull off some early wins especially against guys like Weston. So while I’m rooting for Tyler with my heart, I’m picking Weston with my brain. So LA, is So taking an L.

You, Me, and AP vs Weston Flakes
Brendan vs Tj

Holy shit Tj’s receivers. His trade with Andrew has given him the deadliest WR combo in the league with OBJ and Julio Jones. However, I actually think Brendan will get the win in this one. With OBJ’s health in question I think Tj’s team reverts to being pretty normal, while Brendan has a lot of matchups I like. Tj will receive the nod from me more often than ever this year, but he’ll have to wait for it.

Evan(s) Stevens And the cupcake vs # BaDbOyChEeSe
Steven vs Andrew

I think this will be the lowest scoring affair of the week. As of this writing, Andrew has not set his lineup. Looking at it, I’m sure he’ll start Gurley which should help but I see Steven winning this one. I like Mike Evans and I like Bryant vs the Browns. Andrew’s trade has shown his strategy for the year as more of a balanced attack but I am not convinced that’s how wins are made. It certainly isn’t how ships are won. Dare I say it’s how ships are sunk.

Crook’s Trophy Shop vs #myteamgotnext .
Brad W vs Carey

This is gonna be a close one, but I am gonna go with Carey. His team has actually won a championship and that pedigree is just the tiebreaker I needed. Love the Wilson matchup and believe all Seahawk pass catchers (and thrower) are gonna show up in a big way week one. Oh shit, Brad has Bell vs Browns. I actually go with Brad.

We made it. It’s going to be a great 17 weeks … for me, the reigning and defending Immediate Family Fantasy Football League Champion of the World.