17-25 as it stands. It’s getting out of hand. The people are asking me to pick against them in order to have luck on their side. Nevertheless, I will continue to pick with the honesty and veracity that only I know how.

Matchup of The Week: Crook’s Trophy Shop vs Brad “the poop” Williamson
Brad W vs Andrew

Brad is back in the limelight this week because of his fiery rivalry with Andrew. Andrew’s team has long ridden the coattails of Brad’s namesake or love life (see: Team Princess Lillian). But let’s get down to the brass tacks, I cannot endorse a team starting Kaepernick. In terms of fantasy football that is, I am, of course, a PC Bro. Andrew wins again.

Chips n’ Gronk 7 vs The Tom Hillier Experience
Xavi vs Myself

I can wish I didn’t start Cameron Meredith all I want in about every league but let’s be honest – it’s not gonna change my pick. Me all the way. If you just look through this one, I have better matchups. I would really really really like if Chris Ivory becomes an integral part of my team.

Remember Tyler Berry vs Team Janice Whartenby
Brad L vs Carey

I’m sure I’ll get shit for this one since I’m picking the team that already has 17.6 points on Thursday, but you’ve gotta remember that doesn’t guarantee Brad a win (see: Week 1 vs me). I think this is a Jeremy Hill week (obviously) and I don’t think Crowell is the kind of player we thought he may be in the beginning of the season. Should have traded him somewhere Crookeboy. Lopes has the number one QB in a great matchup and his new toy Jamaal with a great matchup. There is room for both him and Ware to dominate the Saints (see: Whatever week they played the Falcons).

NOMO ROMO vs Josh Gordon Is Coming
Tj vs Steven

This is gonna be a close one. A runner up to the Matchup of the Week, Brad and Andrew (see: The top of this article). Howard did poorly, but I would have picked Steven and I still will. Tj has put something together and if he wins, he should be proud but he’s got a lot hanging in the balance. Will Jizz Rodgers play well again, will Davis do anything, is Eifert healthy enough to be effective, and can Maclin finally do something? All of that leads me to Steven, someone I have been picking pretty consistently. I believe Cameron Brate benefits from Vincent Jackson going down and Steven would be happy to see that as well.

Colin A “missing”person vs Finger Friday
Colin vs Brendan

Brendan will be happy to know that I am picking against him. Colin has members of two matchups that I have already praised. Ware and Julio. Also, of course I am not worried about Marshall’s productivity with Geno because I have long been a Geno Smith truther. TY didn’t do anything against Houston which leads me to believe Sanders will suffer a similar fate and Hurns hasn’t really done anything this season. If he does pick it up, this would be the game. So to reiterate, I am going with Colin even though Murray has the juiciest matchup of all time.

Charles Schwab Series 7 vs Andrew Pooped His Pants
Tyler vs Weston

What the fuck is Tyler doing with his tight end position? Just offered him a trade. If he accepts he will win. If not, he will lose. I’m ready to give him Julius Thomas vs Oakland for this week if I can get someone in return. Honestly, that is my pick. If he can find a suitable replacement then I pick him, but I’m certainly not picking someone who leaves a blank spot in their lineup (see: Xavi last week). Weston, don’t fret I’m sure I’ll be picking you a lot now that you have Zeke and this is kind of a half pick anyway.

 

Stupid picture time:

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Google result for “fantasy football fuck.”